A Confession of Adequacy
I’m going to have to change my tune to adjust to this undeniable reality. I have to acknowledge that what people have been telling me is true. Not to accept their valuation of me would be ungrateful, and I hate ingratitude. And to keep fishing for compliments, which I know is a flaw of mine, would be a disservice to the people who have already, so often, complimented me. (And I can’t even tell myself anymore that people say those things to everybody, that they probably don’t mean it. I can’t believe that so many good people would be insincere just for my sake.)
It’s as if I were missing a limb and had been fitted with a perfectly good prosthetic, but spent years and years whining about how the prosthetic didn’t fit right and how it itched and I could still feel the phantom limb. It’s time to admit that the prosthetic works fine: I’ve got enough self-esteem.
This attitude shift is going to require some work, and my first task will be to believe that I can do it. But that may not be as hard as it sounds. Truth to tell, I’ve come to this peak after many years’ long climb.